Extreme fear of flying?

I have an extreme fear of flying. I can't even think about flying without getting nauseous or feeling the beginning of a debilitating panic attack. I can't even go to airports, I had a minor panic attack when I dropped my brother off at one. I really WANT to fly, I want to travel, but I seriously worry I will have a nervous breakdown and not be able to control it. I have a similar phobia of surgeries, and last winter I found out I had to have an appendectomy. I paniced, they gave me a sedative, and it didn't work at all because I was so worked up already. I'm worried that any sort of anti-anxiety medicine will not work for me. In the short time it took for me to write these details, my stomach has already started to flutter. Has anyone ever gotten over an EXTREME phobia like this? I understand planes are safe and understand how they work, but I can't even think about it for more than 15 minutes before I freak out.